I love being a mom!

I love my girls so much, they are my world!! When I was a little girl I always knew that I would be the happiest if I could just be a mommy. What I didn't realize was how stressful and scary and hard and fulfilling this job could be. My children are both very bright and very busy. I never imagined that a child could be so hard and so wild as my little Emery is, and to make matters worse, Ashlynn is following right behind her. When I was growing up, my sisters and I were shy, quiet, mellow little girls. We liked to play in our rooms with each other and didn't really need to be entertained my our parents very often. My little rascals have a hard time being alone in there rooms. They are constantly under my feet and more loud then I could have ever dreamed two children could be. I have been tested beyond my limits and I am constantly calling my mom and my mother-in-law for advice and help on how to handle these busy little girls. My mom is always at a lose because she too thinks that my kids are tough. But my mother-in-law says I just need to keep them busy all the time. I have figured that out of course but wow is it a challenging job. There have even been times (very short amounts) that I think I don't like my kids, I want quiet mellow children. Then I realize that then they wouldn't be mine. I have also come to realize that if I want them to help me with anything and a temper tantrum explodes, I need to get down to their level and talk to them very calmly and quietly. Yelling has never worked with Emery and I am not below bribing her either.

As you all know, Chris and I are no stranger to Ashlynn being sick all the time. She has always got a cold or a fever or something that we need to take her to the doctor for. In fact just yesterday I found out she will probably need her second set of tubes for her ears to drain and might need surgery to have her adenoids removed. She has never been able to breath through her nose quite right and it gets worse as she gets older. This was nothing new to me. In fact I have come to expect these things from her.

Emery on the other hand is never sick. She is the healthiest little kid that I know. (Just like her mommy.) But let me tell you, when she does gets sick, she gets really sick. I am talking temperatures of 104. She actually did this just yesterday was well. When she gets that sick, I get really panicky and worried about her. I also realize in those moments how much I love her. She has always been my sweet little girl that wants to help. While Ashlynn was in the hospital, she had to grow up a lot. Faster then I would ever want a kid to grow up. She also became the best little helper in the world. She did everything that I asked and even at 3 and 4 years old acted way older then her age. Even when I was pregnant and scared that I would lose Ashlynn, Emery was there to just cuddle with me and make me feel better. I know that without her around, I would have just curled up in bed and waited for it all to end. She kept me going, she kept me alive. I really regret making her grow up so fast, I wish I could go back in change some things, but I know she is a happy little girl and I know that I love her so much!!

I know that both girls are to young to read this, but I want them to know how much I love them. I thank our Heavenly Father every day for the opportunity to be their mommy. I never feel worthy enough, but I am so glad he trusted me enough to give me them. I would never change them, not ever. Their sweet, beautiful, loud, wild spirits is what makes them so wonderful!!

I love you Emery and Ashlynn.